WHAT DO I KNOW?

I don't know a lot.

I know that while turkey bacon is a fine substitute, it doesn't hold a candle to real bacon.

I know that I'm old. I can't see a band on television today without feeling a small sense of anger. I mean, the way these bands dress, the way they act, the songs they write, ridiculous! Who do they think they are? Music just isn't like it was when I was growing up. Back when music meant something and bands were bands! Like these guys:


I know that I understand the irony of what I just said.

I know that before the Affordable Care Act, the amount of money I paid for health insurance out of each paycheck increased every year.

I know that after the Affordable Care Act, the amount of money I pay for health insurance out of each paycheck continues to increase each year.

I know that each year I'm given a cost of living increase that is then cancelled out by the increase in what I pay for health insurance, so that while the amount of money I earn continues to rise, the amount of money I take home stays the same.

I know that I am very bitter about that.


I know that I'm the only capable driver on the road today.

I know that they can reboot as many properties from my childhood they want as long as they leave the originals lying around for me to enjoy.

I know that what I want takes a backseat to what my kids need.

I know that there's nothing like bringing in a herd.

I know that there just isn't enough time in life to watch all of the great television shows out there.

I know that America doesn't run on Dunkin', it runs on Stupid.


I know that I love Dunkin' Donuts coffee.

I know that I can't afford Dunkin' Donuts coffee and instead have to drink the swill they provide at work.

I know that dunking an Oreo cookie in coffee is the closest thing to perfection.

I know that true friendship, true loyalty, is a rare thing. If you have that, if you have someone in your life that has your back no matter what, don't let that go, and always return the favor. Everyone else is your friend for only as long as it is convenient for them.

I know that Simon Pegg makes everything better.

I know that I want, from the very depths of my soul, to see Idris Elba play the Doctor on Doctor Who. Can someone make that happen? For at least four series?

I know that I thought up the idea for this blog post on the car ride home from work last night.

I know that country music makes me angry, I just don't know why.

I know that while I would never attend San Diego Comic-Con, even for free, I would pay to watch all the panels on pay per view.

I know that I couldn't afford to pay to watch all the Comic-Con panels on pay per view and that makes me sad.


I know that the chances of making a living selling your own books when you can't afford to hire an editor or cover artists are slim to nothing.

I know that knowing that won't stop me from trying.

I know that I love my wife.

I know that this blog post might be going on a bit long.

I know that Bigfoot is out there, somewhere.

I know that spending time on Twitter makes me angry.

I know that I can't stop spending time on Twitter.

I know that I'll think of many more of these ten minutes after I post this.

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